10 biggest tattoo mistakes
Tattoos are like people, there are countless different types and some of them are so annoying you wish you could just burn them off the face of the planet. At RetardZone our researchers came up with the ten most annoying categories of tattoos using Google and countless hours they should have been working during…
| The Paragraph | ||
| The paragraph also known as tattoo verbal diarrhea is for people who can’t get to a point. If crazy rambling women who won’t shut up about their feelings and how they don’t like you sticking things in unusual places this is what they’d look like.
Retard Factor: |
1 | |
| Fake Tribal Membership | ||
| Sadly just because you copy a piece of tribal artwork without the obligatory painful initiation and or being related to someone in the tribe doesn’t actually make you a tribal member. Although many colleges will accept your new minority status without asking for paperwork because that would be racist.
Retard Factor: |
2 | |
| The Inmate | ||
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If you want to look like someone who either spent a long time in jail or should have this is the look for you. It’s not fair, but most juries will convict you simply because they are scared you might kill them in their sleep if they let you off. Retard Factor: |
3 | |
| Illegal Use of a Body Part | ||
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When bad taste meets unusual shapes on your body this look is for you. You can make your wholes and crevices into giant 3D practical jokes on your body. Retard Factor: |
4 | |
| The Frightener | ||
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The frightener is for someone who wants to scare small children and never wants to make it past a first job interview. If you want halloween to last every day of the year in possibly carcinogenic permanent ink this is the look for you. Retard Factor:
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5 | |
| Spelling Victim | ||
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Surprisingly, most spelling bee champions and English majors in college shy away from careers as tattoo artists. Some tips to avoid this permanent spelling mistake:
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6 | |
| Drawn with a Crayon | ||
| If crayons could permanently scar your body this is what it would look like. Colors that look like an ugly block of mexican houses and artwork that belongs in a coloring book are the two ingredients needed to make this look.
Retard Factor: |
7 | |
| The Billboard | ||
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The billboard is like the fence in downtown with hundreds of posters on it. If you want your body to look like an old lady’s eclectic novelty crap collection this is the look for you. Rather than getting one nice one get lots of bad cheap ones and try to overcompensate for quality with quantity. Retard Factor: |
8 | |
| Sideshow Freak | ||
| This is a category of tattoos who says they don’t care what the world thinks but still wants all of them to stare at them and draw attention to themselves. If you never plan on having a real job or normal friends this is the look for you.
Retard Factor: |
9 | |
| Unintentionally Terrifying Portrait | ||
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People is one one of the hardest things to draw, and the free market isn’t enough to stop everyone who sucks from attempting portrait tattoos. Lawsuits and federally licensed drawing tests could help thin the untalented herd. |
10 | |
Before you run out and get a tattoo you should consider the consequences and avoid any of these stupid ideas. Most of all go to a decent place that doesn’t accept coupons from TGI Fridays or let your friends try out any homemade tattoo machines unless they have tried it out on themselves or at least three other people first.
